Date:	2005-08-20 23:37
Subject:	anyway
Security:	Public
Mood:	cheerful
Music:	'pa pa oom mow mow' - rockapella and kermit

Today was good.
As was yesterday. Very.
I feel like tomorrow will be too. Good stuff.
Very.
That's all really.
:)

Date:	2005-07-14 22:38
Subject:	this entry will not be spell checked. ;p
Security:	Public
Mood:	sleepy
Music:	'Blue eyes' - cary brothers

Wow.
Today, was long. very.
Had to be at whispering horse for 8 this morning. We had a few cliants in the morning then we sat and then ate then rode. The morning got off almost with out any issues. (NOTE: Almost. hhaha. D.T. *cough cough* i felt real bad but no one was hurt so that's good.)Then we ate lunch, well Krisen did, I had 'toasted penut butter crackers, corn bread and water. haha. I rode Jatra. He's a cool kid. It was fun. Very. Kristen and I had some laughs. It was just us beacause Pat left to go to cosco. We sat around some more passing the time. ("5 minutes just went by") and sat some more. ("20 mins down 1 hr to go") Echo amused us for a while. It was fun. then we cleaned the buckets, well she did most of the cleaning, I was pretty much there for support. Hahaha. it was a good time. Then we had more cliants. and It got really hot and stuff. It was a fun day. kinda long but very fun. Then I left there, got home a little after 6. Jumped in the pool for a few minutes then Paco called me from france. Hahaha. that was really nice. Glad everyone's having a great time. makes me happy. Very. The I ate because I was starving, went to wsyt. That was fun. good times, good times. I enjoyed it. We rehersed and talked and it was nice.
Then i came home. thrilling huh. hehe.
So today was busy and tomorrow looks that way too.
Whispering horse 9 to 11 ish.
Home. then movie w/ mona.yay
then ?
Then home & practice guitar like a wild animal.
go to guitar
home
then nothign for a bit hopefully
then to ashleys for the night. :)
yeah.
Today was fun though.
Very.
And sunday we are goin gto the show. So, between now and the en of tomorrow I like to ride Rissa or something. I dont' see that happening though. I'm not too worried about it. But still. I try real hard at life. haha. ;) Owell.
I'm shot.
So I am going to bed.
hahaha
YAY!

Date:	2005-07-13 22:39
Subject:	"... don't tell any one about it. Just go do it."
Security:	Public
Mood:	cheerful
Music:	"work" - jimmy eat world

Today was good.
Yup.
I've been sleeping really, well, not well lately I guess. And Spunky's been sick and he was crying at 1 and I couldn't fall asleep at all. I hate that. It's frustrating. Anyway I'm up again a few other times i think I don't even know. Then 4 I'm up and then Spunk starts crying and stuff and, not fun. So to make a long story short he made a mess downstairs again and then i couldn't fall asleep AGAIN, i was wired.And my knees started hurting. So I ended up talking to my mom and was acting goofy. I feel kinda bad for keeping her up though. we had some laughs though. I eventually fell asleep. Then had to get up to go to whispering Horse. Which was good. Karlie came today. It was good. It was pretty nice out today too. Then I came home, took care of some stuff worked on wsyt stuff, called to see if I have to babysit Saturday. Practiced piano, worked on more wsyt stuff. Piano man came. Ate, talked to my mom for a minute because she came home from work, left to go back to the whispering horse.
I really like it over there. it's nice. Very. And It makes me happy. Very.
came home. Ate dinner, got changed fed rissa got my stuff went to wsyt. It was a good time. Very. I really liked the movie we watched the other night too. It was really really good. I kept thinking abotu it. Just so cool. very.
Got home my parents were out on the porch so i went over and sat and talked for a while. It was nice.
And now I finaly have a moment to myself to just chill.
Me Gusta.
I've been drawing a lot lately. I drew this horse sunday and finished up monday, seriously it's peobibly the best thing I've ever done. I'm really proud of it. then last night after watching that movie at wsyt I did some sketchy stuff of ballet dancers. Just because. Haha. But then I had this idea to do fred jones, like from the ben folds song fred jones pt. 2. What I have started is pretty cool I think. Again the movie kind of sparked the feeling to make me think of it. because in the song, i'm sort of drawing the end where he's painting. Yea.I'm kind of excited to finish it.
I still have so much to do this week it feels like. This week went by really fast tomorrow's already thursday. I've got to be at Whispering horse at 8 probably all day. I'd kind of like to get to come home for a few hours where there's no one and go visit Mona. But I dono we shall see what happens. I think the last client's at 5:30 so then I'll come home and leave for wsyt. and yeah. It'll be good.
hahaha.
Hopefully tonight I'll sleep ok tongiht. i'd enjoy that. I did a lot today so hopefully i'll just pass out. I'd love it. L O V E it.
G'night.

Date:	2005-07-11 12:26
Subject:	I heart summer.
Security:	Public
Mood:	:D
Music:	"Nobody Puts Baby in the Corner" - fall out boy

Today is a perfect day.
Just because.
Just thought I'd update, haven't in a while. The cape was nice. The weather was kinda crapy. It was still fun though. It's nice to be home now, just chilling out and stuff.
I fell like this week is going to be very productive. I'm excited. Very.
I've got a lot to do today, so I think I should go do it. Or something.
Yup.

Date:	2005-06-23 18:25
Subject:	how could i forget!
Security:	Public
Mood:	excited
Music:	"trusted" -ben folds

I have photo shop now!

Can't wait to really get to play around with it.

It's about time!

Soooo coool!

Yay.
Ok, I'ne done now.

:)

Date:	2005-06-23 17:48
Subject:	da da da daaaaa!
Security:	Public
Mood:	mellow
Music:	"Last Ploka' -bend folds (on my new speakers. Beautiful) :P

I got my computer back!
It's amazing. I love it. It works and it's so fast and I love it. I still have ALL my pictures! And music. and stuff. Yay. I bought new speakers, the other ones were unfixable. I HAVE SOUND!
I can listen to music on my computer. It sounds sooooooo good! They're nice. It makes me glad. Very


by the way...

SCHOOL'S ALL D-U-N FINISHED!

Half day today. I dono, it didn't really feel like the last day but i'm so glad it's over. Very.

.... very.

Whispering horse has been great. got to leave early today because none came after 5 ish. I was excited. I really like it. A lot.
WSYT started. Which is also very cool. Very. My audition's tonight. I'm a little nervous. But not. I felt so accomplished for picking out a song real early, and trying to work on it a bit so i could be prepared for once. And last night at music night I realized I just shouldn't do that song. I don't know, I wanted to take a risk and above all have fun with it. I thought I had it pretty set but obviously didn't. Such is life. So with some help I realized it was ok. (Also realized that I won't be embarrassed or such for a long time because that took care of things in that department for a long time.)So like I said, with some help I realized that i can still take my risk and have fun just a differnt risk. I've just got to not even worry about it, and stop expecting these whild things from myself. Anyway, the perfect compromise: 'Good Morning Son'. Yep. Usually when I'm sining around people I'll goof around and stuff on perpous, and, good moring sun isn't exactly the funny peppy song choise I was going for BUT... the goofyness sort of works for it. And I'm wicked comfy with it, hahaha, I only play it like every day. And I'm GOING to Have fun with it, I'm NOT going to let it bother me, it is what it is and I am what I AM. It's just wicked dumb because I know I can't sing like some of the other kids, so I try my best and I end up killing the song. yes yes. So anyway, (I feel like that said the same thing like 8 times differently and it's not a big story at all) (Owell) I'm too hard on myself all the time over every thing and it's really NO BIG DEAL. I wrote about how I'm never happy with anything I do in my Shakey portfolio, and it's true. But I'm just going to have fun. So there self.
I heart WSYT.
Tonight we're leaving for the Cape. I an so freaking excited. What a way to start the summer. Just getting away and chilling out. I can NOT wait to just do nothting and chill. I've been doing so much work especially up to the end of this year and i've been so busy and doing so much between homework and stuff and just being so tired and staying up and going to whispering horse and staying after and it's just been nuts. I'm so thrilled to gest get away for a little while. I can't wait to sit around doing nothing. And going to the beach! Yay beach! Oh, So happy.
I am so passing out on the way there. Wicked tired.

Today was very busy.

(I'm sure everyone cares about the break down of my day... O yaaa) (note it's not there) ;P

Anyway I'm about done.

YAAAAAHOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO SUMMER!!!!!!!

I heart you summer vacation.

Have a good one!

Date:	2005-06-14 10:17
Subject:	Meeee...... update???
Security:	Public
Mood:	:)
Music:	fan and people talking

wow.
So anyway i'm in sped block.
it's pretty warm in here.
School is almost over.
YAY!!!!!
Makes me happy. But I have a ton more work to do and stuff. But things are slowly coming to an end. It's nice. I'm trying not to freak out about everything I have to get done. We shall see how that goes. But so far so good. I've been working on my art fina essay and decided to take a break.
My computer at home is being an idiot. That's nothing new really though.
Owell.
I went and fed Kara's horses this morning before school, went well. Been doing some riding and stuff. Went to the show at shallowbrook sunday for a little with Amber and her mom Kara was suposed to be riding. saw a few people from end of hunt, didn't say hi though, I feel kinda dumb about that. Owell what can I do. I want to get some pictures up pretty soon of stuff that's been going on. Yup yup. It's been soooo hot lately.
la dee da. lalala.
Schools dumb.
I'm thrilled for it to be over. Thrilled.
Well I should get back to work.
Soooooooo much to do.
Not enough time.

:)

Date:	2005-04-07 19:14
Subject:	let's seee...
Security:	Public
Mood:	energetic
Music:	'Home'

Today was actually pretty good. I had zero desire to get out of bed though.
Owell.
All that band kids are gone. it's very quiet and there's no one here. Well there is, but a lot of people are gone. hope they're having fun.
I should be doing my shakey HW now. I sort of an but not really. But I am. It's getting there.
There was a go around today after school. Not too many people came but it was still nice to see some people and hear what's going on and talk for a while. I went on a slight not rant but talked for a little about something that i didn't really want to. But did. But didn't need to i guess but it had relation to what i was talking about so it just kind of went. owell. I miss that class.
Then i came home and worked on guitar. yep yep.
Autumn and Alyssa came over to do homework and hand out and eat and stuff. Then we went out side to play!
It was wicked fun. Kellie came home and we brought Katie out to see her new hair cut and highlights... she looks soooo pretty and a little older. Hahaha. katie is one cool kid.
"A shiny penny, for a shiny lady." ;P
And we jumped on the trampoline. and it was a good time. yep.
So about the HW.
hummmm.
Oooh survivor tonight, steph and bobby-john are left on their team. I want them to win something before they merge. that'd be fun.
Anyway I'm all set now i think.
tomorrow's friday!
Yay!

Date:	2005-03-28 10:21
Subject:	good weekend. Very.
Security:	Public
Mood:	hungry
Music:	none

Humm well i dont' really think i'vw got tool ong but Owell. To make it short:
I got my licence on saterday! so that was pretty exciteing. :)
Annnnnnddd! I got a guitar. Hahaha. Also very very cool. I'm excited. Very.
Last night all the Forrests were out fireing the 'Spud Cannon'. That thing's a good time. Very. It's pretty much this home made thing, with a long PVC pipe and a trigger things and you shove a potato down it and spray hairsprsy in the bottom (yea yea aqua net)and it launches the potato like two, three yards down. It's sooooo cool. Fire like shoots out of it. It's neat. We had some good laughs. "Some where over the driveway, potatos fly, spuds fly over the driveway, why then oh why can't I. If little taters fly..." Yeah it was a good time. That thing's pretty powerful thoguh. I got to shoot it, haha it was fun. And then Mr Forrest shot off fireworks in the road. They were nice. Very. Oooooh. Ahhhhh. I love my street.
Then of course I had to finish my Shakey quotes. Blah, but i did have a LOT of help. so i didn't really wigg out and it got done. it was very nice.
But anyway the weekend was good. I did enjoy it quite a bit if i do say so myself. And the weather was wicked nice.
But now it's monday. haha
I feel bad though because this morning Kell called and asked what we had first so i thought it was whatever we had when we had gym. So she said she was going to sleep in. WEll it turns out that it's just the oposit I feel bad I hope she's not going to miss something. I thought we really had the other days' calsses today. Pooh.
I finished all my chem in here. That was nice. But I had a quiz today i forgot about. It wasn't pretty.
24's tonight. Yea yea.
Class is amost over.
have a good one.

Date:	2005-03-21 10:24
Subject:	what else would I be doing in here? Really now.
Security:	Public
Mood:	good
Music:	none

Well it's snowing.
Thrilling.
Not really.
Anyway. There's much to update about.
Tuesday my mom and I went to job lots. yup yup. And saw Mrs Sweeny. I had a heart attack my mom was like, "SUSAN!!!" Turns out the three girls still take their lessons at falcetti's down the street. So we went to go say hi. I haven't seen Angela in years. It was sooo cool. We were best friends and it was just such a conicedence to see her. She got into theater too. She's in Greese at her school it's at the end of the month I think. I'm so going. Anyway she's still playing the guitar and writes her own stuff and everything. (speaking of which after they left seince we were there my mom and I went in anf looked at guitars, goood stuff) She was doing a little showcase kind of thing at the Enfield Libary on thursday so my mom and I went to go see. Joa's dad was there too and he played and was... amazing. The teacher guy was the pants. And Angela .... just amazing. She was wicked good. It was really nice to see her again. She sent me a really really nice email. It was cool. it's weird to think how much we've grown up over the years. We really have. we're going to get together at some point to catch up and stuff. I'm excited! Very. Her friendship meant a lot to me and I never forgot about it. And I've always wondered what she's been up to and stuff. Last time I heard anything about her was when I bought the piano and saw her name on the lesson sheet and battle of the band paper at falcetti's. And that's about it. But hi It was just really good to see her. Yup. Very. Anywho
Saterday was the improvoramma. It was fun. And interesting. We had some really good laughs. Really. So funny.
Yeah oh and class is over now.

Date:	2005-03-15 10:16
Subject:	ummm
Security:	Public
Mood:	blah
Music:	none

I just got back from guidance, and i'm not feeling very guided. In fact i'm slightly annoyed at the moment. I trying to do the best thing, I have no desire to go away to an art school. It would be a waste. Why would I go to learn about something that I like that isn't going to get me a good job. So agrivating. I don't know if OT is going to be right for me. I have no idea. That's what I'm at least trying to find out. I have no clue. And interior design and Ot, "are compleat opposites with nothing in common." Ahhh! This sucks. I want to be creative, that just the thing! I want to do what I like I want to be able to be creative. And she wonders why I'm "lost in thought". I have no idea what to think. It's soooo stupid. I don't know. No one thinks i should do anything that i might not be good at. I'm not really good at much at all. I have a hard time with everything. Even the things I love i probably wouldn't be doing if i didn't liek it so much because i'm bad at it half the time. I mean how should I know. Either I like it or I don't. I like art. yay. That dosen't mean i should go to school for it and live and breath it and possibly end up hateing it. I'd get like shot down at an art school anyway. If they think my stuff is good then I highly doubt that it's anythign compared to other people who are SO determind to do it. nothing wrong with that.. But I just couldn't. I don't want to ruin my what I like about pictures and taking them and being Crafty. That's just me. I get excited about curtins and colors. And I want to stay here, I don't want to waste money. I have no idea. I know what I want and what I'm doing and then I don't. I mean I honestly think that no matter what I want someone's going to think it's not for me or whatever. Owell. We shall see.
I'm tired.
I don't want to rewright my essay tonight.
I don't really have anything to do in here. I started my chem. But I don't remember how to do part of it. I figure it out at some point.
Then tomorrow I have that shodow thing. At Mile Tree. Yup.
Well I'm going to go sit or something.
Class is almost over.
I kind of wish I had lunch next.

Date:	2005-03-11 10:24
Subject:	"Aloha Friday"
Security:	Public
Mood:	okay
Music:	none

I am SO glad it's 'finaly friday'!
I just finished my Chem test a little bit ago. That was fun. No, not really. Owell. It's done. This morning kind of sucked for some reason. I dono. Owell.

Anyway. Saterday was AMAZING. I haven't had the chance to update seince then. It was so great, I had so much fun. All the plays were wicke dgood. And all the kids were awesome. It was just a perfect day. Nothing but good things to say abotu it. It was just so awesome.
Pictures to come soon.

Copenhagen was the other night. It turned out really well. We had a pretty good turn out and they all liked it and were paying attention. Makes me happy. I really liked that. It was cool. It was really very nice. We did really well. Makes me happy.



Class is just about over now so i'm going to wrap it up I guess. Have a loverly day.

:)

Date:	2005-02-23 09:53
Subject:	'Inside a room she paints me BLUE'
Security:	Public
Mood:	super
Music:	garden state soundtrack's on in the kitchen

Aloha!
I haven't updated this in a while. Fun stuff.
Well it's vacation. And because of that I am a happy kid.
We finally painted this room too. I'm soooo excited. I L O V E it.
it's blue, like a lightish blue, makes me happy. it looks really good. There's no curtain on the window right now, and it's really bright in here at the moment, and I just love the color. it's nice. And we're putting in a new rug, it's almost this charcoal dark gray color. I'm wicked excited. I wish I took a before picture. Owell. After will have to be good enough. haha. I'm however not looking forward to moving all the rest of the stuff out of here. *cough the desk cough* that's going to be a beast.
It is so nice out today.
I am such a fan of vacation.

Humm well I think I'm gonna go do something productive w/ my life.
Have a good one.

:)

Date:	2005-02-10 09:58
Subject:	eff
Security:	Public
Mood:	blah
Music:	it's pretty quite

WEll we have school. That's fine I guess. I'm in sped. I don't really understand the question on my chem HW and I just read my reader response, and realized there's A LOT of summary. Garrrh. I was wicked glad because it sounds alright, and i didn't it kind of fast. There was not freaking out about it, but in theory most of it's wrong i think. I'm having Mrs Danker read it to tell me what she things. If it's not right I'm probably going to try and retype it. Well actually it's 10 now, I probably wont have time. I don't think I want to anyway. Owell. Maybe I should have put the part about the weird guy at the wake. Never mind. Owell
Any way it's thursday. So tomorrow is friday and that, is good. Very. Copenhagen this afternoon. Fun stuff. Well I should go see what's going on.
Yup.

Date:	2005-02-08 10:00
Subject:	Fun fun fun
Security:	Public
Mood:	good
Music:	nothin

Well it's tuesday. Isn't that great?
I think so. SOrt of. Sometimes.
I have nothing to say. And that could be great too. I think. Maybe. Whatever. I'm done with everything i needed to do in here. And I've had enough of over hearing anatomy and track for now and yeah. We have After Midnight rehearsal today. Fun fun.
I've got to draw shoes tonight.it's most likely going to take me forever. Owell.
I feel a lot better yesterday and today.Today I'm actually really, very awake. Yea yea not tired.
Only like 4 minutes went by.
Hummm. I think I might actually go try and figure out that math stuff for my chem quiz tomorrow. Or something.
Have a loverly day all.

Date:	2005-02-04 20:59
Subject:	heck yes...
Security:	Public
Mood:	mellow
Music:	"should've been a cowboy" (live) -Toby Keith

Snow day today.
How about that.
Pretty cool if you ask me.
Well not really. It was very nice out today. Very
I rode and did some hw stuff and other assorted things. Rissa was realllly good. So yeah. Today was pretty good.
Went to the wake tonight and stayed for a few hours, it was long. Very. I sat. Yea.
I feel so bad for David, really. Just really sad. Saw everyone else. That was, kinda cool I think.
Anyway, I dono.
That's about it though.

Owell.
I think I'm gonna go play some piano.
Yup yup.

Date:	2005-02-02 09:17
Subject:
Security:	Public
Mood:	chipper
Music:	Everyone is being really loud. Garh.

Well it's is FREEZING in this room.
I am so clod right now. This is crazy. Owell.
So yesterday was bery interesting. Yeah. My mom came to get me from scholl and said my dad was in the hospital. yea. Something about he was having chest pains and yea. He was also very hungry and wanted us to bring him a meatball grinder. That's my dad for ya. We went home first and my mom was like 'um we might have to take the truck back, i don't know'. I was like ... whaaat?
So we went to get him a grinder, which messed my mom up because she has some trouble getting from some places to another, and dosen't "know her east from west". So we were going the wrong way and had to get off and turn around and go back the other way to get to the hospitatl. Parking was a beast. Yeah. That place is a zoo, it's nuts. I'm very sick of hospitals by now by the way.
So we get in and they have to 'locate' him. There were SOO many people lined up in the halls and just everywhere, my dad said he was sitting in the same place seince 9 that morning. They were trying to admit him and get him a room and stuff.
So anyway, he was in endfeild and had really bad chest pains and called my mom to ask her if he should get it checked out and she obviously thought that he should. So he went back to sulivans and they drove hin to the hospital. He appearently tried to move a thousand pound pallet. What was he thinking? geez. *shgh* somthing showed up on his EKG and i don't know, and something about pulling something or a collapsed lung. Yeah. So we stayed there for a while. that was thrilling. They put him on morphine earlier for the pain but he said it hurt to breathe. My mom was like, "don't breathe" It was funny, I dono you had to be there maybe. So we left. We ended up picking up the truck. That was interesting. So I followed my mom home from sullivans in the van. I had a slight issue trying to go through a light, and had a few terrets syndrome moments just because. And we ahd to get gas. and then continued on, the car infront of me was going so slow, i was like, thank you. God's in the car infront of me. hahaha. It was nice, but they couldn't make up their mind what side street they were suposed to go down. yeah that was fun. Then my mom pulls this WILD stunt and crosses stright over to take a wild right turn to go down the street where circut city is. I almost died. But I made it. hahaha. She pulls in to circut city and i pull up along side her and she say's "you doing ok". *blink blink* "um yeah. mom, what are you doin?" she thought she had to turn there for some reaoson. Lost moment. Wow. But I did well enough and made it home alive. yea yea.
Then we got home on the answering macine it was David, my brother, half brother whatever. And he was really upset, his mom had died. So that was too bad.
Um on a lighter not my dad called and said he got a room, almost 'had a hart attack' when he heard about our adventure home. So that's good they finally got him into a room.
Geronski brought good music memor and sunrise sunset. I was excited. Very.
I kind of hope today's not very eventful like yesterday. Yeah. I should go do my board work now thgouh.
Oh and happy groundhog day.
Yea.


(wow hahaha Meg just skipped by, and came back and waved. I had a slow reaction to that one, took me a sec. hahaha. I think that just made my day so far. Fun stuff. :) ) ( sorry i really thought i should share)

I'm done now.
Really.

Date:	2005-01-25 10:07
Subject:	nothing thrilling (at all)
Security:	Public
Mood:	good
Music:	-

New classes today.
So far I've had chemistry. And I really think I'm going to be able to switch. So that's good. I've got art next too, which should be good and then Shakespeare!
I have to go see Wages at some point. Tomorrow I think I'll be all set and stuff to switch in there.
I really don't have much to say. I'm just very board. Very.
Hummm.
Well three day weekend was nice. Today's going by pretty fast too. I'm a big fan of 4 day weeks. Yup. Piano tonight. That's about it.
I actually should go put my green sheets in my folder and stuff. Joy.
hahaha.
Have a loverly day.

Date:	2005-01-20 12:13
Subject:	update
Security:	Public
Mood:	jolly
Music:	it's kinda loud in here

A LOT has happened seince I last updated.
The "sparknotes" version:
(In no particular order, leaving things out I'm sure) Yeah, anyway:

~ My piano is the freakin' pants!
~ I found my teal halter top that I've been looking for forEVER.
~ After tomorrow no more math for me in highschool! Yahooo!!!
~ All my finals are D-U-N finished with.
~ Monday I spent the day helping Mona w/ her baking final. Yeah yeah Smurf. It was fun, and came out Really good! Smurf yeah. that's what about 10 hours of slaving over a cake will do. hahaha. It was a good time though. "And this is the reast of the milk. Now would be a good time to add it." "Oh, shit." Hahaha. Good times. Very. :D
~ Monday was also spent with lots of other cool people, And we finally got to go out to eat w/ the caroling money. Fun stuff.
~ My Mem broke her arm and (to make it short) had to come an live with us for a while. And well, that sort of upset me. And I felt wicked bad because it seemed like I was being selfish and stuff because I didn't really want her to come and stay. It just made me kind of upset. I pretty much camped out in the computer room and like played piano all day, I got to talk to a couple people who just made me feel better and stuff. But yeah. And she came Saturday and it was her birthday so we had a little thing for her. And i dono. So anyway. Turns out she didn't want to stay. Guess she felt bad or just didn't liek it or what ever and wanted to go home. So she ended up not even staying for 24 hours. Yeah. *shrug* I dono.
~ Bruce also came on Saturday and said we were going ot go to the beach soon, but we're not going Saturday anymore, we're going to wait for febuary. I'm excited.
~ Tomorrow's the PAVAS talent show.
~ We're also having rehearsal for Copenhagen tomorrow.
~ Sunday Mum, Dad, Paco and I went to do see the bowser doo wop part (volume 4) ;D it was cool. I liked it. Muchly.
~ I feel like going to yoga.
~ Otto, Alyssa and I went on an adventure on friday. It was fun. Well it wasn't so musch of an adventure really but yeah, it was fun. And Autumn did my hair and made it straight and stuff, and they had my dad cut it. And it looks so much... Not dead and stuff. It looks nice, I like it. And everyone's been commenting on it. We had fun though. Yup.
~ It feels like today is friday.
~ the bell's going to ring soon

'ave a good one.

Date:	2005-01-11 09:23
Subject:	humm dee dee
Security:	Public
Mood:	mellow
Music:	school

So i'm in sped. With not much to do. We DO have a final in here. Another dumb essay thing. I hate those. Owell.
Wow. Now we're sining happy birthday. Wow.
Alright.
Ohhh but.... we get cookies. What can I say, I'm easily amused.

So guidance yesterday. Yea. I spent the whole gym class down there. She really REALLY liked what I brought. To be quite honest I was kind of suprised she was SO enthuseastic about it. She wants to buy earings from be. Buy them. Wouldn't let me give the ones I brought with me to her. Of course there's no way I'll have her pay for them, but I will make them. But really now. She was amazed by the paperclips too. She thought the pictures were great and she assured me that she really did think they were. That made me feel pretty good. Just to hear that about my pictures made me happy. She did kind of make me off to seem like there's so much behind them like a flower's at a really interesting angle for probably a deeper reason then, it just looks better that way or something and yeah, I just see something and think, 'self, that'd make a good picture'. I like pictures. A lot. And I LOVE taking them. I dono. So any way. She was like When are you going to look at colleges? Me of course being like. Whaaaaa? I don't know. She started telling me about art schools, and thought I was nuts because i'd never really seriously considered doing that before. She busted out this book and was looking up all different places and wants me to check out these schools in boston and stuff. Not IF but WHEN.
I don't know. And she sees me as well to quote her 'opposite of prepy'. and thinks I'd fit in just fine. And would love it and all this other stuff. Which maybe i would, and i mean looking into things isn't going to hurt anything. And I said that. But where's it going to get me. What's a four year degree in art going to do for me after foour years. Same thing w/ thearter. I mean as much as I LOVE this stuff. I just don't see myself doing this. Because i don't think I could. Like It just wouldn't happen or something. And it's frustrateing. Because I don't know what I want. But Maybe I do. I'm thinking as far as being realistic. Ya know. I love art. I love photography. good.
So I want to do those things. I want to have time in life to do what I love. It's like realizing and knowing that there's no way I could have a creare in horses. Just dosen't happen. But that dosen't mean that that's not going to be a big part of my life. That it's not something that's always going to be there and that I'm always going to love. I want to have the time to have a life. Not just a job after college. I think it's great she thinks I could do the whole art school thing, even if sometimes i feel like she's trying to assure herself that I really do fit in the "art student" mold. I want to be able to do something creative.
And it's so dumb because no one approves of anything less than great. Well sort of. I'm not sure this is gonna sound right but Owell.
Like I did below avrage on every part of the PSATs and looking back it's kind of funny how guidance lady was explainging it, "well um, here's avrage, and you're here. And this one youre here and this is where most people fall. And this one youre a lot colser to avrage, which is here" Who carse about some test and some paper. And I've got good grades. And I try. I work SOOOO hard. And yea. And who cares what school you go to. Or what you learn there. Everyone who says, "oh reaaaly." I mean it dosen't matter.
(having said all that still dosn't make it easier on me) (Like it's not bothering me and I 'don't care' at the moment. Just well. yeah.)
Maybe I can open a little shope and sell my things or something. And do photography on the saide. I mean I really want to take art classes and stuff but again, I realisticly don't see that as like what i'm doing in the cards for me. Which is ok. 2 years at HCC or what ever, that's fine. A degree from an expensice school that's just going to be useless is just, well , useless. I mean i don't have to sign away my life or sell my soul or anything. I'm not writing stuff in stone. But I just really think that what's most important is that I'M happy and content with what I'm doing. Rather than care about what everyone else says. It's not really that important.
Just for once it's nice that someone's really gun ho about something i'm doing andthinks it's worth going after something and just doing it. But, above all the other reasons I wouldn't want to ruin a hoby and something i really enjoy and make it my job, not my life. No one likes school, no one's going to like their job for some reason. And I don't mean everyone's going to hate there job, but it's just a job. And I mean like mrs Danker says I have so much potential, and guidance lady thinks my stuff is great and wants to hang it up in her office and thinks i should be selling it and going further with it and stuff but. (humm I don't even remember where i was going with that) Owell) hahaha. I dono. Same old stuff really. I mean what if i did go in to wedding cunsolting or something like that or occupational or speach therapy or whatever. I mean. I dono. I've got plenty of time. And that's good. but everyone's making it seem like I don't and that it's important to have it all figured out. BUt in a way I do. So that's just good enough for me at the moment. Although it's annoying. yup.
That's my story.

Anyway Last real math test of the year today. History final's dure tomorrow. And that's about it. I finished filling out that internship paper to the best of my ability so yup.
I really need to go practice piano for the piano man tonight. Yup yup yup. I think I'm gonna go sit else where or something now. And i'm not going to spell check this beast. So there. yeah.
So have a loverly day everyone.
:)